Desde que nacemos, nuestra consciencia es incapaz de identificarse con todos sus fragmentos a la vez. Es por eso que hacemos el recorte, desde un supuesto de supervivencia física y afectiva. Recorte que luego se va cristalizando, hasta que la escisión ya es total. Creemos que somos solo una parte de todo lo que somos. Lo demás, queda proyectado.
El proceso de integración requiere que empecemos por asumir que todo eso que creemos que “es del otrx y no tiene nada que ver conmigo”, es parte de nuestro yo-profundo o yo-integrado. Vamos a profundizar un poco más en todo esto.
Desde que la humanidad conoció la idea de Verdad, existe la idea de que puede existir una verdad. Por lo tanto, pueden existir dueños de la verdad. Lo cual significa que si una verdad es verdadera, lo que la contradice debe ser falso. Esta premisa es la fuente de toda guerra -tanto interna como externa. El poder de ser dueño de la verdad, de decir “las cosas son como yo digo, el Ser es lo que yo digo que es” es el máximo poder del que se puede creer poseedor una persona. Esto, reflejado en los juegos de poder que existen en cada vínculo, es la base de nuestras polarizaciones. Si una de nuestras partes es verdadera, entonces la otra tiene que ser falsa. Esto es a su vez trasladable a la esfera del bien y del mal. Si una parte de mí está bien, entonces la otra debe de estar mal. De nuevo, hay poseedores del bien y poseedores del mal. Y cada unx de nosotrxs está regido por un tipo de moral exclusiva, en mayor o menor medida. Cada unx de nosotrxs, si nos sinceramos, percibe ciertas cosas como bien y ciertas como mal. Ciertas cosas como verdaderas y ciertas otras como falsas. En esto reposan todas nuestras polarizaciones, que devienen a su vez patrones vinculares. Cuando ambas partes de un vínculo pretenden tener razón, y que esa razón excluya a la otra, el vínculo está polarizado. Un vínculo polarizado es reflejo de las polarizaciones internas de los participantes del vínculo. Una polarización interna es reflejo de un vínculo polarizado. Un vínculo polarizado es guerra.
En el Tantra nunca existió la diferencia adentro-afuera. El humano siempre fue entendido como existencia-abierta-a-la-existencia. Aunque nos cerremos a ella. Es como si fuéramos frascos abiertos en el océano. Adentro hay océano, afuera hay océano. Y hay un frasco, y cada frasco es singular. Pero adentro y afuera es exactamente lo mismo. El frasco sería un código, un modo específico y único en que el océano-adentro y el océano-afuera se vinculan. Lo que somos es un modo de relación entre el océano-adentro y el océano-afuera -que son lo mismo. Ahora bien, el frasco-mandala está condicionado, polarizado, separado. El mandala está incompleto. El frasco intenta entonces cerrarse, por todas esas partes que están mal o que son indiginas, que tiene que dejar afuera. Empieza el relato de que el océano-adentro y el océano-afuera son cosas diferentes. Y que uno está bien y el otro mal, o que uno tiene la verdad y el otro no. Esto le impide al frasco-mandala permanecer abierto-a-la-existencia. Le obliga a percibirse como algo separado, aislado. Para sostener su identidad separada, es necesario sostener sus justificaciones, culpabilizaciones y proyecciones. La alquimia comienza cuando estas tres tendencias son reemplazadas por el interés y la pasión integrativa.
¿Qué es el interés-pasión integrativo?
En principio, diría que es un viaje inacabable de reencuentro y danza de nuestras polaridades, que son las polaridades de lo humano. Es abandonar la polaridad básica de bien y mal, ser y no ser. Abrirnos corporal, emocional, mental y existencialmente a que ambas perspectivas de una polaridad son verdaderas a la vez. Interesarnos y apasionarnos por el contenido de cada lado. Escucharlo, abrazarlo, danzarlo. Así como es, sin querer modificarle nada. No hay un lado de la polaridad que tenga la verdad, que esté bien, sino que ambos lados son parte de un mismo proceso. Asumir esta simple premisa transforma profundamente el modo en que nos vivimos a nosotrxs, al vínculo y a la existencia. Y asumirla no es nada fácil, porque implica una revolución terrible, implica sacarnos del trono de la verdad para sumergirnos en la más profunda incertidumbre, para asumirnos un pulso, flujos de intensidad, existencia-abierta-a-la-existenica. ¡Es morir! A todo lo que creíamos que éramos. Y abrirnos a descubrir la deliciosa complejidad que somos -que a la vez se siente terrible y extática.
Ya no es más yo soy así y mi madre asá, o mi padre es así y me hace esto, o mi pareja esto otro. Devengo entramado vincular. Soy vínculo. Soy un código específico de vinculación del océano-adentro y el océano-afuera. Un código que hasta ahora viene estando doblegado por la moral y los condicionamientos. Necesitamos para este proceso abandonar todo aquello que creemos que está bien, y todo aquello que creemos que está mal. Y para eso tenemos que ir reconociéndolo. Es un proceso inagotable. Es pescarnos una y otra vez creyendo que un lado está bien y el otro mal, que un lado posee la verdad y el otro no. Pescarnos una, y otra, y otra vez. Y cada vez que lo hacemos, ver qué pasa si nos corremos de ese lugar y nos abrimos a que ambos lados de la polaridad sean válidos a la vez. Entonces, la alquimia puede tener lugar. El vínculo deviene la potencia del despertar. El despertar es la potencia del vínculo. El lenguaje, apoyado mucho en la dualidad polar, pierde su sentido. Los hemisferios se reencuentran. Shiva y Shakti danzan una vez más.
Entre todos nuestros pulsos deseantes hay uno más, uno anterior. Es el deseo más profundo que tenemos: el deseo de reencuentro de todos nuestros fragmentos. Por eso, constantemente nos encontramos con la parte negada. Por eso vamos vivenciándola una y otra vez: ¡porque lo único que queremos es encontrarnos con nosotrxs mismxs! Es que estos fragmentos conversen, dancen. Introyectar el contenido que ha quedado proyectado, volver a hacerle espacio en el fuego de nuestro corazón. Calor en que los fragmentos se reúnen.
Es preciso, para esto, aprender también a recibir amorosamente estos fragmentos. Que por alguna u otra razón han quedado desplazados. Que han vivido en la sombra y el aislamiento. Y que, por lo tanto, al aparecer y ser validados y asumidos muchas veces vengan con toda su sombra a cuestas. Necesitamos abrirnos amorosamente a nuestras partes que venimos percibiendo como más horribles. Abrazar todo aquello que por tanto tiempo hemos rechazado, desplazado, odiado. Todo aquello que nos ha generado asco. Entonces, la alquimia, el abrazo, la caricia, la danza. El océano-adentro se vuelve a abrir al océano-afuera, el océano-afuera se vuelve a abrir al océano-adentro. Devenimos océano.
Es un proceso incabable, es reescribir en cada una de nuestras células todos los mitos que la humanidad viene escribiendo. Al abandonar la proyección puede aparecer una integración, nuevos modos de vivir el vínculo. Modos singulares, creativos, únicos. El patrón que venimos repitiendo los humanos puede dar lugar a la singularidad vincular, siempre cambiante. Pueden aparecer nuevas conversaciones y nuevas danzas entre esas partes que antes parecían contradictorias e incompatibles.
Y no creo que exista una integración definitiva, no existe nada definitivo en el Tantra. El proceso de integración es un proceso inacabable, entre la dulzura y el abismo, entre lo terrible y lo hermoso. Un proceso que podemos vivir cada vez más abiertxs y amorosxs a medida que lo vamos practicando. Más allá de la ansiedad por una integración definitiva que no existe. Es un proceso muchas veces mucho más lento de lo que la identidad quisiera, mucho más desgarrador. Hacer el guiso, hasta que las verduritas se integren, toma un buen tiempo, una buena temperatura, una buena presión. La alquimia tiene un tiempo que no es el del ego. Solo puede haber, cada vez, un poquito más de disponibilidad, amorosidad. Un poquito más de espacio y apertura.
Te invitamos a conocer más acerca de nuestra propuesta, enterándote de nuestras próximas actividades, sesiones individuales de Terapia corporal astrológica, clases de Yoga y nuestra formación anual en Tantra, para habitar este poderoso proceso de transformación!
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